Mental Ferris Wheel & my latest crush!

A long post indeed but read it pleez.

From the last 10 days I am in a completely weird mood(I call it weird bcoz' its very difficult to describe it). Writing posts which is the result of a momentary mood and feelings following it.

I really cannot write what all I feel. Its like a Ferris wheel, a thought comes to my mind then as I keep thinking about it another thought comes in. Then after a series of thoughts i find my thoughts getting repeated.

Today morning I was thinking about blogging and such stuffs...which we all do. We write what we feel, we get some comments, we feel bad if no one reads it, we write all big great things, we share awards, we make more friends, we say sweet things to them. I was kind of happy that I can share my views out here.

At that very moment I took the latest subscription of RD(Reader's Digest). The cover story about Slumdog Millionaire. I read it full. What do I feel? Sad......(the article was about the condition of those 2 kids of the slum one of them(Azhar,Rubina) doesn't have a roof over him.)

"Priya what do you do for these people?"

"When I grow up I'll surely do something".(very wrong attitude)

I have always taken decisions in life based on thinking. I mean i think a lot and then decide.

But what??...That doesn't mean always the "ferris wheel" would stop at the correct decision. I mean the correct mood and the correct feeling.

It was really depressing to lose my cat. Sometimes I cry buckets(not funny). I do not know anger come into my system all of a sudden.

But now while I am writing this..I feel an angelic compulsion to forgive those boys who were responsible for its death.

Now back to RD. The editor of rdIndia...wrote a very good article on the cover story.
He must be in his 40s but I got a crush on him. Mohan Sivanand

I do not know why the looks do not attract me to a person. Yeah even if it does it will be surely for minutes only.

I honestly feel all people commenting on my blog just do so coz I comment on their's.
I won't say please don't comment or please only comment if you like what I write because I do know that this momentary stage of the "ferris wheel" will also turn away.

I am going on writing what I am feeling now and surely i'd regret for this if .......(I hope you know now)
tc guys
and gals too
:)
ps:) I had written it earlier on..got published juss now.

Are you really in love?

No big words nor phrases..... You really love anybody...the बेइंतिहा प्यार only if....

• You can make any sacrifice for that person. Any here means real sacrifice and not anything else. I hope you all know what real sacrifice means. Sacrifices aren't easy.
  
• Whatever that person does I mean even if that person doesn't care about you or doesn't behave the way you do or may be is very rude to you. What I basically mean to say is loving that person without caring about his/her love/attitude towards you.

R U really in love?

ps:) My personal opinion..pleej don't come for a war :P

An answer that made me realize.....

Daughter : Daddy I do not want to talk to you and mummy.
Daddy : Why dear?
Daughter : You always agree with what mummy says and mummy agrees with what you say whether its right or wrong.
Daddy : OK! So tell me dear would you be happy if your mom and I never agreed at all.

The gal who finds answers so spontaneously for everything couldn't get any for this simple question.

This is true. It had reely happened. When i think of this now it makes me laugh..but am also proud of my dad who made me understand such a thing with such simple words....

She belonged to him!!

After years she opened her personal diary that she had maintained from the age of 16. Now it was more than 5 years that she hadn't written anything.

The day was no good for her. She had a hectic schedule...tiring one...she tried to sleep...but couldn't. After all job hunting is not that easy.
Naima turned a few pages....one of the pages written on 8th April 1994.

"Aalekh looked at me today and passed a smile to me. I thought I would faint of happiness. I had been desperate for a glance from him."


When she read the name 'Aalekh' tears came out of her eyes. He was a gem of a person. Such an understanding, caring soul. She couldn't believe that he wasn't in her life anymore. Her dreams to get settled with him....all were shattered when*****he died in a car accident the day before their marriage. Her first love. She decided to live with his memories. Be single for the rest of her life.

She then thought about Samar(he was the one who introduced her to Aalekh). The name that she called her best friend.She missed his presence. He had not even bothered to come and console her. There was no one with her in the most difficult times. She was shattered.
Naima ....had always taken him for granted. Now she realized how important that stupid, flirty, funny guy was for her.
With each page...she felt she was reliving her past years.

When she turned the next page...something fell down....It was a rose...a red rose...
"My angel ... I love you"(written on the page). She kept it back as a memory of Aalekh.

She couldn't express what she felt.
Those words had great power..to make her forget all her troubles. She had been financially down for the last 2 months. Trying hard to find a job.
It was almost dawn. She got up from the floor, straightened her back. Got ready for another day..tough..but she was confident.
After locking her house she checked the letter box hoping for an appointment letter.
Everyday she had been doing this....but she never got a good news. But she still had hopes.
She just wanted it badly. Naima put her hand inside the box....there was a letter in it.
"God please let it be an appointment letter"
Ah! her face lit up. She had got a job. She felt it was a miracle. A miracle of love and trust.
First days of the job were difficult but soon she got settled.
One day as she was leaving for home....someone called out "Naima". She turned at once
and she saw Samar. (His office was just opposite to her's).
Samar: Hey how are you?Naima: I am fine. Were were you all these years?S: Me...? My dad had a project abroad so had to go there with him.N: oh!
She invited him to her house. He reluctantly said yes.
Seeing her open the door he assumed Aalekh must be at work.
S: So hows Aalekh?N: (with tears in her eyes) He's left me forever. He's no more.
S: (he was shocked) What? When did this happen?
N: On 17 March 1999.... the day before my marriage.

He couldn't speak up. Shocked...and guilty for not being there for her.
N: How's your life? Where's your wife? (she assumed that the 32 yr old guy must have been married).
S: No wife...I didn't marry.
He went away after saying this.
Naima couldn't digest this..."huh! this guy didn't find a girl for himself?"
Moreover his behaviour too had surprised her.
Days passed by...he met her daily....tried to make her happy...He had completely changed. This irresponsible guy who always made blunders had now become a caring gentleman and always used a white handkerchief(the gentleman accessory according to her).
At a restaurant one day.....after they had lunch...
The waiter came with the bill....as he took out his wallet one of his buddies came in...he gave the wallet to Naima... and told her to pay the bill.
She couldn't believe what she saw in the wallet. It was her pic. "Why on Earth would he keep my pic in his wallet?"
She took out the pic..
and turned it..
What she saw was even more shocking......
words....penned down...

"My Angel"

She could understand everything now...
the rose......
the words....
the abroad trip....
his being unmarried...
the change...
She now respected this guy. Who was in love with her but never told her so that she might not feel hurt.
In the depths of her heart......she too loved him for all that he had done.
She turned her eyes to the sky.....felt her name was true to her life....

Naima means belonging to one.



ps:) This is my very first attempt on a story as such. please do become my critiques :)
pps:) SPECIAL thanks to all (Jincy, Prashant, Harshita, Yamini, Madhuri, Sameer, Stephen, Diana, Sormita,Farah.) who helped me choose a name for the character NAIMA.
ppps:) The name Naima showed different meanings... when I consulted different sites..so just go with the meaning i mentioned above.

I am Happy!

So at last my exams are over... I've been away from the blogger world for 3 months...though not completely away... ;)

3 months ~~~~ that means several thousand moments. even more!

I spent most of my time studying....that was quite painful...
sometimes study was so boring and sometimes I used to get a sudden feeling "wow what a subject" and then I used to get accelerated.
:P:P
I used to cry a lot. Sometimes without any reason and sometimes for some reason.

I used to travel in my wonderland..building beautiful castles....

Once during study I saw that i was working in INFOSYS.....wow what a dream..... That was the most beautiful one.

Daily morning my mom used to keep a rose beside my pillow...That rose..whoaaa its smell gave me thoughts of the "Rahul" times
:P

Honestly roses are very romantic...

I also grew in spirituality....I used to listen to a Malayalam song...(devotional) ..Naadha Ninne kanan

very touching...

My favorite pastimes ..

##1 listening to film songs from the neighbour's TV :P
##2 Feel tempted to sleep when mom and dad used to have their siesta :P

Many things like selfishness of friends...reely made me realize....Its not necessary that people would be as good to you as you are to them.

but never mind...there are many good things in this world so nothing to blame.

I love my life.. I love God...I love my parents...I love my friends...
I am grateful to all of the above..for making me a special human being ......
I truly believe I am special only because all of the above value me....

This is getting long....hehehe........many more experiences to share......Believe me..am not the same I have tried honestly to change myself......not because I was any bad but because my loved ones wanted to see a different PRIYA......

Happy APRIL FOOL's DAY.............in advance :P

Juss One More to go ........

Huh! juss one more exam to go friends and I'll be bakkkkkkk

hah! I am badly waiting for the 30th to come..ahhh!

To blog and blog and blog...
.

ahhh! i also sympathize with those whose EGG JAMS r gonna begin.....

well!

I can juss say get well soon...off the Cancer called EXAMS......

I Wonder.........!! .........??

My first paper got over today...a sense of relief...but that's not what I am gonna post about.

I just came across an article written by Sangakkara. I just wonder if I would have faced an attack at a place would I be able to write something so positive? I am sure even if I was trying out a diplomatic answer, anger would have surely come up.

Try reading this http://www.hotklix.com/?ref=link/479863

ps:) Comments have been disabled!!