Pages

Saturday, 4 April 2009

She belonged to him!!


After years she opened her personal diary that she had maintained from the age of 16. Now it was more than 5 years that she hadn't written anything.

The day was no good for her. She had a hectic schedule...tiring one...she tried to sleep...but couldn't. After all job hunting is not that easy.
Naima turned a few pages....one of the pages written on 8th April 1994.

"
Aalekh looked at me today and passed a smile to me. I thought I would faint of happiness. I had been desperate for a glance from him."


When she read the name '
Aalekh' tears came out of her eyes. He was a gem of a person. Such an understanding, caring soul. She couldn't believe that he wasn't in her life anymore. Her dreams to get settled with him....all were shattered when*****he died in a car accident the day before their marriage. Her first love. She decided to live with his memories. Be single for the rest of her life.

She then thought about Samar(he was the one who introduced her to
Aalekh). The name that she called her best friend.She missed his presence. He had not even bothered to come and console her. There was no one with her in the most difficult times. She was shattered.
Naima ....had always taken him for granted. Now she realized how important that stupid, flirty, funny guy was for her.

With each page...she felt she was reliving her past years
.

When she turned the next page...something fell down....It was a
rose...a red rose...
"My angel ... I love you"(written on the page).
She kept it back as a memory of Aalekh.

She couldn't express what she felt.
Those words had great power..to make her forget all her troubles. She had been financially down for the last 2 months. Trying hard to find a job.
It was almost dawn. She got up from the floor, straightened her back. Got ready for another day..tough..but she was confident.
After locking her house she checked the letter box hoping for an appointment letter.
Everyday she had been doing this....but she never got a good news. But she still had hopes.
She just wanted it badly. Naima put her hand inside the box....there was a letter in it.
"God please let it be an appointment letter"
Ah! her face lit up. She had got a job. She felt it was a miracle. A miracle of love and trust.
First days of the job were difficult but soon she got settled.
One day as she was leaving for home....someone called out "Naima". She turned at once
and she saw
Samar. (His office was just opposite to her's).
Samar: Hey how are you?Naima: I am fine. Were were you all these years?S: Me...? My dad had a project abroad so had to go there with him.N: oh!
She invited him to her house. He reluctantly said yes.
Seeing her open the door he assumed Aalekh must be at work.
S: So hows Aalekh?N: (with tears in her eyes) He's left me forever. He's no more
.
S: (he was shocked) What? When did this happen?
N: On 17 March 1999.... the day before my marriage.

He couldn't speak up. Shocked...and guilty for not being there for her.
N: How's your life? Where's your wife? (she assumed that the 32 yr old guy must have been married).
S: No wife...I didn't marry.
He went away after saying this.
Naima couldn't digest this..."huh! this guy didn't find a girl for himself?"
Moreover his behaviour too had surprised her.
Days passed by...he met her daily....tried to make her happy...He had completely changed. This irresponsible guy who always made blunders had now become a caring gentleman and always used a white handkerchief(the gentleman accessory according to her).
At a restaurant one day.....after they had lunch...
The waiter came with the bill....as he took out his wallet one of his buddies came in...he gave the wallet to Naima... and told her to pay the bill.
She couldn't believe what she saw in the wallet. It was her pic. "Why on Earth would he keep my pic in his wallet?"
She took out the pic..
and turned it..
What she saw was even more shocking......
words....penned down...


"My Angel"


She could understand everything now...
the rose......
the words....
the abroad trip....
his being unmarried...
the change...
She now respected this guy. Who was in love with her but never told her so that she might not feel hurt.
In the depths of her heart......she too loved him for all that he had done.
She turned her eyes to the sky.....felt her name was true to her life....

Naima means belonging to one.



ps:) This is my very first attempt on a story as such. please do become my critiques :)
pps:) SPECIAL thanks to all (Jincy, Prashant, Harshita, Yamini, Madhuri, Sameer, Stephen, Diana, Sormita,Farah.) who helped me choose a name for the character NAIMA.
ppps:) The name Naima showed different meanings... when I consulted different sites..so just go with the meaning i mentioned above.

48 comments:

faery of the wilds said...

u crazy grl!!! y didnt u tell that earlier??? well nice work!!!

ANWESA said...

a gud 1st attempt!!!keep writing..

Suresh Kumar said...

A nice story. Ahh.... the waiting game.... Its so hard to play... If you really like these waiting games rent THE LAKE HOUSE starring sandra bullock and keanu reeves.

But such love stories are hard to find in real life. Its only in movies and books and may happen with lucky souls.

And by the way I liked the name aalekh.. You coined it?

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Lovely, lovely. That was a beautiful and poignant love story. That was so beautifully done my child. You could not have done it better. And to think this is your first attempt at story telling. Write more short stories. I remember Sameera with your style of story telling. Keep at it and you will go places. Thanks for the wonderful short story. I enjoyed it. God bless you always.

Diana said...

I loved this...I am telling this from the bottom of my heart.

Preetilata【ツ】 said...

me too loved it a lot lot lot. do write moreeeeeeeeeeeeee. and yes i loved d name Naima. :)

Think Tank said...

idiot..u cud hav told this was what all that name hunting was for? sachhi critic banun? nice story. it only needs a little tying up and it will b prfect

Think Tank said...

oh btw ...do something so that the song doesn't load every time i visit ur blog ..otherwise ill have 2 take another sabbatical

Chronicwriter said...

it was good joyce...

the story was predictable... it was a sweet ending.. i love the name naima..

keep them coming .. with more twists and turns and unexpected endings.. :)

www.chronicwriter.com

Priya Joyce said...

@ jincy:

heheh what didn't I tell?

thanx re :)

Priya Joyce said...

@ anwesa:

thanx yaar. yepp sure :)

Priya Joyce said...

@ suresh:
thanx re
:)

hmmm but it was not waiting yaar it was more like not being to marry anyone else so he didn't marry.

well ya real lyf...may be but rarely :)

oh! nopes I didn't I too love it soo much.

Priya Joyce said...

@ Mel:

whoaaaaa thanx friend :)

I soo loved the word POIGNANT.
It reminds u to Sameera's style whoaaaaa U made my day thanku thanku
:)
:)

Priya Joyce said...

@ Diana:

thanx yaar I am very glad u liked it.
:)

Priya Joyce said...

@ preetilata:

thanx yaar sure..will!

The name reely helped me to create a plot.

Priya Joyce said...

@ Farah:
hahaha I juss didn't think that way :P

tying up? what sense re..?? didn't get ya!

thanx :)

Priya Joyce said...

@ Farah:

oh! hav removed it theek hei?

Priya Joyce said...

@ Chriz:

Thanx re..

juss tried my hand at it..would write on more topics other than love..have currently some in my mind..
thanx for the suggestion
:)

Diana said...

I was about to tell u that i had problems reading ur post last night...there was some snag with ur template...good that u changed it.

Priya Joyce said...

@ Diana:

oh! telepathy :P
lol

Pallav said...

i loved it,,, in fact i liked it... tough i was quite sure abt end...
i already gussed ths..
one suggestion instaed of gving purse if u cud hv write,
"he gave his purse to her to pay the bill n went for loo"... i think tht wud be best....

pls dnt mind it is only a suggestion..
wonderful narration with gr8 expressive words..
looking fwd for odr post tooo....

cheers :)

Mayz said...

that was really wonderful for ur first attempt...hope to read mnay more from ya

yamini meduri said...

wow PJ...so beatutiful story....i loved it..!!!

n the name game..wowo the one you selected is cute enough..!!!

beautiful..beautiful...beautiful..!!!

joiedevivre said...

critics
- i cudnt actually get the feel, make it more expressive

- it was a typical sad romance (somewhat like babul movie)

appreciation
- naima is a nice name

- i liked the way you concluded

Priya Joyce said...

@ pallav:

thanx re:)

yeh i cud hav ..but i put friend cuz frnds ke aane se hadbadi mei he cud hav given the wallet na tats y.

no yaar y wud I mind wen I openly asked for suggestions. thnx for reading it in full.

Priya Joyce said...

@ Mayz:

thnx re
:)

will surely write.

Priya Joyce said...

@ yamini:

thanx yaar
:)

the name actually helped me take the plot.
:)

Priya Joyce said...

@ joie:

hmmmp mei prannn leti hoon madam ke aapko feel karvaake rahoongi :P

sad yeh ok agreed! ending toh happy thi na re
:)

:P

thankiyuuuuuuuuuu

:P

Phoenix said...

hmm a worthy first attempt at fiction.. :) keep it up!

[now i sound like a school teacher.. hehehe!! :P]

Kartz said...

A tad predictable. Not bad for a first attempt... More to come. And yeah, liked that name.

Peace.

Priya Joyce said...

@ Raka:

thankiyuu :)
yeh aap toh abhi se hi teacher bann gayi :P

Priya Joyce said...

@ kartz:

heheh tad u mean low degree ??

everyone told me here it was very predictable.

oh! ya sure..will write more.
thanx for reading.

Hemanth Potluri said...

naima that was a wonderful write up :)...or sorry i misplaced the name...priya..dear..i am soo involved into the story...it was sooo wonderful....u sure a story teller...the name was awesome..

urs..hemu..

Priya Joyce said...

@ hemzii:

welcome back re :)

and thanx am glad that u loved it :)

Aneesh said...

Well, well, well!
Look, who's become a writer...LOL
Mmmm, I wasn't around here for a while and you even started writing? :P.. Just kidding..
Nice attempt, I should say. Well written. The story was good and all the character names sound special.
:)

Priya Joyce said...

@ aneesh:

hahah lol bcuz u weren't here I cud write peacefully :P

thankiyuu now am gonna write more..with more...depth.

:)

Saranya said...

WOW, That was a great work Priya! I loved the story, it was very touching. Lovely! Write more...

Priya Joyce said...

@ saranya:

thanx re
:)

am happy tat u liked it

sure :)

Prashant Sree said...

Nice one, Priya... The names does sound cute !! ;)

Keep coming up with new ones.

Priya Joyce said...

@ Prashant:

thanks bro am glad that u liked it :)

Amal Bose said...

really good.. considering its ur first attempt.
u should continue writing..waiting for more

Priya Joyce said...

@ Amal:

hey welcome here :)

and thanx well sure...will keep writing :)

Keshi said...

u r so good at it Joyce, well done!

I just cant write stories at all..I suck at it :(

Keshi.

Harshita said...

Nanhi Pari... tussi gr8 ho...

I loved the sweet and simple story...

waisey pehley kyun nahi bataaya ki naam kiskey liye chahiye tha... itni mehnat karvaayi...hahahaha

:P par mehnat rang laayi...the story is beautiful...

Priya Joyce said...

@ keshi:

hey thanx dear...hey u can write much better than I wrote...don't tell me that u can't...

:)

Priya Joyce said...

@ harshii:

heheh thanx yaar..

oh! woh toh surprise tha :P

lol

yeh ..sahi mein :)

freelancer said...

OH MY GAWD!!!!!!

Ayushi said...

:)