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Friday 8 August 2008

My first Poem ever.....

Dearest friends I am posting a poem which I wrote today during one of the lectures.
Its not at all funny its a serious work of mine. I am posting it here as this is my most popular blog. Please read it and give me your valuable opinions. Tell me... what do you understand?

I pretended to work hard
I showed off the absent effort
I tried to convince my loved ones by arguments, top arguments
I did all except the main motive the main thing which had to be done
I sailed through my race but was sad and depressed.
The useless me was the label I put on myself.
I was ashamed of doing less than a tenth of my ability.
Tears came running out of my eyes
In vain of course!
Then came a caring voice
Actually two voices
The ones which always encourage me
The ones which always stand by me
They made their voices one
And that one powerful and striking voice said
“Though you be an utter failure
though your existence be a shame
we will be there always for you”
I was touched
It made a wound of affection
deep down my heart
It penetrated to the very inside of my heart
I stood there thanking God

And here I stand now with the pride and honour
of being the daughter of such great parents.

Priyadarshini Joyce

32 comments:

Saranya S said...

U r so sweet :) The poem is cool.

PS: U wrote it during ur lecture? Hmmm!!

Anonymous said...

Ah...Heal the world...

lukkydivz said...

nice work amidst the lecture ;)

k.ø.c.h.ü said...

And that one powerful and striking voice said
“Though you be an utter failure
though your existence be a shame
we will be there always for you”

so @de end of de day de VOICE still said U wer an utter failure ha...? if dat voice wer from ma mouth i would've slapped out wazz resting inside u...n help u bring out wazz best in u...rather than showing sympathy.. ;-)

DEAR...GOD SHOWS U DE WAY...BUT IT'S U who has 2 walk thru it...

k.ø.c.h.ü said...

n dear...de work is luvly...!!! clap clap(lecture hall...ha...hmmm...) keep writing...

Priya Joyce said...

@ saranya:

yupp it wasn't an important lecture so i jotted down wat was going thru my mind.
thanx

Priya Joyce said...

@ ayushi:

wat do u mean?

Priya Joyce said...

@ lukky:

thanx buddy

Priya Joyce said...

@ nithin:
so you did not get to its depth yet.
The voice means that it will support me if I become a failure in life that is even after trying to instill in me the zeal of hard work and getting success if I fail then also those voices will never desert me never leave me. Btw that voices is of my parents and they have promised me to be with me always in watever trouble I am
Than doesn't mean they will not try to improve me. It just means they will not desert me,
And this is about my tenth board exam results. u know nothing can be done once u get the result.

I am angry with you.

Priya Joyce said...

@ nithin:

hey wat is this my work is gud or bad? please make it clear.

Sameera Ansari said...

Awww how sweet!Wonderful first attempt :)

joie de vivre said...

ohh
"my buddy poetess"
aur likho
i wish to read more from u

:))

Priya Joyce said...

@ sameera:

thanx buddy its my life experience

Priya Joyce said...

@ joie:

haan phir koi boring lecture hua to zaroor.

Pooja said...

lovely 4 a 1st attempt...:)

Priya Joyce said...

@ pooja:

thanx buddy

Aneesh said...

OOH!!!
I don't know whether this is a coincidence, I've just posted about my own poem LOL

Well, what I understood. Mmmm I guess you failed in some exams or something and you were disappointed and your parents stood by you!!! LOL

BTW, you have good talent in this. May be you could try continuously :) This is how we discover talents.

Quietude N said...

sweet poem,deep feeling...

Vishesh said...

hope you are alright.....

tc....:)

Priya Joyce said...

@ aneesh:

yupp u r rite my parents stood by me.
Actually I did not fail I got less perc in my tenth board exams tats all.

oops u too poem ha ha Lemme see

Priya Joyce said...

@ quietude n:

thanx frnd
heya welcome to my blog

Priya Joyce said...

@ vishesh:

why do u say that; does my poem says something like tat?

thanx

Maddy said...

Congrats on your debut!!

What a wonderful parents! and
what a loving daughter!!

Wishing you a world of happiness,joy,love,care and affection today and everyday!!

Priya Joyce said...

@ maddy:

thanx buddy

welcome to my blog keep coming

Lucifer said...

i strogly recommend u shud attend more lectures n write more such poems!!! nice!!

Priya Joyce said...

@ mayz:

thanx buddy ha ha

welcome here

Keshi said...

excellent!

Keshi.

Priya Joyce said...

@ keshi:


ty buddy

Hemanth Potluri said...

awesome...another poetess born in the world of blogger..

urs..hemu..

Priya Joyce said...

@ hemanth:


thanx buddy

Anonymous said...

Is a song by Michael Jackson.
oh even i can't explain why but that was what got out of me when i finished reading your poem...but maybe i said it because there were elements of despair, helplessness in the poem, which had the potential of being turned into very bright ones by universal love,patience and acceptance.

Priya Joyce said...

@ ayushi:

yupp buddy u got into some depth i must say.